Leadership Lesson # 1: ASK

I think I should start a whole series of blogs on lessons from my dad. There are so many I can think of. My dad, who is now adjusting to living without his life partner of 63 years (my mom), is an amazing man. I’ve always known he was a great leader. He was a banker who grew through the ranks in his career to be a bank president. His corporation moved him a couple of times to get floundering banks back on track. He’s been retired for almost 20 years, but he’s still a leader. He has much to teach. And I have much to learn.

So I’ll start with this lesson #1 . This lesson is about the “Ask”. I followed my dad around his small Iowa town for a few days as we planned my mom’s funeral. Each person we met during the process had a story. I’d say “Dad , how do you know him?” And he’d say “I helped Joe start his business 30 years ago.” As we traveled about town there was a theme to his stories. My dad had incredible influence, because he wasn’t afraid to ask.

When someone came to my dad at the bank to get help starting a new business venture, he would do this match game – if the bank couldn’t finance them fully he’d find other people in the community with resources. He’d ask them to help. And so often they would. He financed the family practice clinic that way. Now the town has one of the best medical centers in the area.

There was the parking lot by the church. The church was growing and there was no parking, other than this lot across the street that was about to be sold. So my dad asked the city “if I buy this parking lot and donate it to the city, will you promise to keep it a parking lot so the church can have it on Sundays?” They drew up a contract. The parking lot is there, shared by the church on Sundays at no cost to them. What a great ask (and a generous purchase, I might add, but that’s another lesson.)

There was a woman in town who had inherited millions. She loved giving. My dad loved asking. She funded so many important things in the community. He was never afraid to ask her. Then my dad asked the city to honor her with an award. They did.

My dad makes ask through the local paper. He asked his community through an editorial to approve funding for a new library. They so desperately needed it. He made a great ask. The bill passed. The library is under construction.

My dad joined the mayor on trips to ask different corporations, industries, and companies to move to their small Iowa town. These asks paid off. The town has continued to grow with some major industry moving in.

As I heard all these stories (and there are more) from my dad and the people we met I wondered how many people are waiting to be asked. To be called upon by someone with the vision of what could be. Someone with the courage to make a direct ask to a person who could make a specific difference.

Knowing how and when and who to ask has got to be a great leadership trait. Jesus did it so well: “come and follow me,” and they left everything and followed him.

Who should I be asking? Who is just waiting to be asked? It seems so simple, just ask….

A day worthwhile…

We recently went on our “vacation” for 4 days to my in-laws Missouri farm. They aren’t farmers, but they live on 200 plus acres of beautiful hill country complete with cliffs, a river, a pond. It’s a great place to unwind, which was much needed after a month of unexpected happenings and emotions.

Well, 1 day into our 4 day weekend the big ice-storm hit. We were in smack dab in the middle of the worst of the storm. We spent two days and nights with no electricity or water. As I write this I am amazed it was only two days It felt like forever in the dark. (We drove home, my in-laws had 4 more days after we left before their power was restored!) It gave new meaning to my blog title, that’s for sure!

We kept commenting on how natural it is to flip a switch and have something happen. Dozens of times I turned on things out of habit, to no avail. Instant “nothing”. Suddenly, our days became about going to get water, heating water on the wood stove, stashing things outside that needed to stay cool, hauling water from the pond to flush the toilet, working by candle light or flash light to cut up food, etc. It took work to live. And not much more than basic living was accomplished.

Not that many years ago this was how everyone lived. It’s rather astounding. I have been thinking about how much I expect out of my days – how productive I feel I must be to justify my existence. Staying warm and fed is certainly not good use of time…that’s easy. I hardly think about it. I must accomplish many things in a day to feel like I did my part. We have a society of producers. We need to contribute to society, do something important; get our “work” done!

So what would happen if suddenly we had no power. All we had time in our day to do was find a way to survive each day – feed our family, stay warm, find water. Many in the world live that way. Is their life important to God, even though all they do is survive? Are they “worth” anything to him? Why is my worth SO tied into what I produce. After only two days of doing not much more than eat, sleep, and play alot of cards, I was so ready to get back at something “worthwhile”.

I am a product of my producing culture. I need to think on this more. It’s so ingrained that I am not sure how to imagine living differently. I know in my head that God doesn’t love me for what I produce. But my heart tells me differently when I spend a day and get “nothing” done.

How does this fit with all God requires of me – “to act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with my God?” Am I really doing each day what really matters to God? I wonder.